No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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