Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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