I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I need moral support for this bender
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Randomize
