ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
