The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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