how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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