I wanna bring you to show and tell
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
