if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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