And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Houston, we have a blender
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
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