I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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