You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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