I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I can't turn off my feet"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
