I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
