You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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