Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize