can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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