Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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