Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
