Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I want to be your penis for a week.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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