We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
