I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.