She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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