that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize