the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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