dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
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Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
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Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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