So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
My ass is underappreciated
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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