I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
