He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize