this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
