My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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