I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize