I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
