She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize