Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
So much rum. So many feels.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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