Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
