Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
