Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
