WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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