I haven't been this sober since birth.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
