Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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