Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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