Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Randomize
