seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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