no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
