Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
