Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Also, beer. Big fan.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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