Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(970): View more from Colorado

Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(970): Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game. http://tfl.nu/c0fd

Replies (11) Good night (4628) Bad night (625)
Favorite
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(610): Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming! http://tfl.nu/wucs

Replies (9) Good night (2969) Bad night (694)
Favorite
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45

(773): View more from Illinois

Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(814): i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45 (773): Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy http://tfl.nu/wt4o

Replies (7) Good night (3486) Bad night (955)
Favorite
(917): View more from New York City

I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(917): I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex. http://tfl.nu/nr6p

Replies (7) Good night (5361) Bad night (1201)
Favorite
(330): View more from Ohio

The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(330): The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops. http://tfl.nu/2l9n

Replies (11) Good night (4635) Bad night (1132)
Favorite
(240): View more from Maryland

Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(240): Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present. http://tfl.nu/qzgl

Replies (9) Good night (4344) Bad night (820)
Favorite
(603): View more from New Hampshire

i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(603): i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws" http://tfl.nu/3sed

Replies (3) Good night (3263) Bad night (1129)
Favorite
(713): View more from Texas

I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(713): I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me. http://tfl.nu/01pr

Replies (6) Good night (1283) Bad night (722)
Favorite
(540): View more from Virginia

I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(540): I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey? http://tfl.nu/z446

Replies (9) Good night (2427) Bad night (477)
Favorite
(210): View more from Texas

And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(210): And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses. http://tfl.nu/edcx

Replies (3) Good night (743) Bad night (350)
Favorite
(473): View more from Grenada-Carib

She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(473): She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?! http://tfl.nu/amuq

Replies (5) Good night (529) Bad night (379)
Favorite
(+61): View more from Australia

You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+61): You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you. http://tfl.nu/171s

Replies (6) Good night (1164) Bad night (255)
Favorite
(304): View more from West Virginia

I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(304): I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned. http://tfl.nu/jnka

Replies (5) Good night (796) Bad night (269)
Favorite
(+61): View more from Australia

I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+61): I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces http://tfl.nu/enrv

Replies (1) Good night (538) Bad night (213)
Favorite
(520): View more from Arizona

Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI

(1-520): View more from Arizona

this is why i love drunk you

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(520): Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI (1-520): this is why i love drunk you http://tfl.nu/owbm

Replies (2) Good night (796) Bad night (257)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: