Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
