Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
