I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
