Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
home. puking in laundry basket.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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